Birdnesting

A recent article in the New York Post, April 28, 2016, described the “new divorce”: Birdnesting, where the children stay in one home while mom and dad live and leave every couple of days. One parent stays in the marital residence while the other rents or buys elsewhere. If the “non-resident” parent is not fortunate enough to be able to afford a second home or apartment he/she may get creative and dependent and couch surf with a network of friends. Those who advocate birdnesting see it as “prioritizing their children’s well-being… it is about more than the physical space… a child’s home is truly within the relationship with both parents.”

However, Sarah, 42 a Park Slope, Brooklyn divorce lawyer said, “Birdnesting sucks.” She and her ex-husband are rotating in and out of a Brooklyn studio apartment while their children stay in the apartment they purchased. Sarah says, “I feel like I don’t have a home. Plus, we still bicker…. He complains that I leave the house a mess and I hate seeing his stuff in the closet.”

So, what’s the answer?

Give the concept some thought, but recognize that it will take a great effort from both of you to succeed.

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Image: Steve Jurvetson on Flickr. Used with Creative Commons license.